Society - People

By: Chris Flynn - at June 21, 2013

15 Weird Ways People Improve Their Confidence

Improve Your Confidence Everyone wants to be more confident. Browse the shelves of a bookstore, and you'll find hundreds of books that fill those shelves detailing exactly how people can be better, slimmer, stronger, and more confident. There are lots of different theories about what it takes to become more confident. Some people spend thousands of dollars on confidence boosting courses and sessions. Considering how many of them are out there, it's a wonder that people seem to buy these methods. After all, if they really worked, would we all still be looking for a solution? Maybe it's time to try some new ideas for boosting confidence.

15) Buy a Cactus
Using a Cactus to improve your confidence! In "Strange Things to Weird People," one woman decided that the best way to make herself feel better was to buy cactuses. Buying cactuses was about more than making herself feel better, she said. As she explained it, cactuses are the perfect confidence plant. They are prickly, and they don't care about what anyone thinks of them. Sometimes they are pretty, but more importantly, they are almost entirely self sufficient. The kind of cactus didn't matter to her. She appeared in the article with a whole series of cactuses, each one slightly different. From the looks of that cactus collection, she should be brimming over with confidence by now.

It's certainly not unusual for people to purchase things to make themselves feel better. Shopping therapy is one of the offshoots of this. However, even the most avid shopper doesn't generally buy cactuses. Of course, this woman insisted that the other reason that the cactus was such a great confidence booster is because it serves as a constant reminder that people don't always give you what you need. In fact, you'll be doing good to get one or two good compliments or draughts of water every so often. It's amazing that this symbolic purchase actually encouraged her and brought up her confidence level. After all, it seems to be more of a reminder of how hard life can be. However, the successful cultivation of a plant, even if it is a cactus, can be quite impactful when it comes to boosting your confidence levels.

14) Pretend to Be an Actor
Acting to improve confidence CBS reports that one young woman came up with a great idea to improve her confidence levels. She started pretending that she was an actor. No, she didn't pretend to be one particular actor. She pretended that she was acting out her ideal life. She did this for everything. She pretended that her life was a movie that she starred in, and so she decided to figure out who she wanted to be and be that person each day.

This isn't so weird when you look at other similar options. Cosmopolitan, Redbook, and even Psychology Today advocate the "fake it till you make it" mindset. It's the age old belief that if you act confident, people will assume you are confident. Then you'll start to believe that you're confident. Even Dog the Bounty Hunter said something like this on his TV show. But pretending that you're an actor in your own life is a little strange. What makes it strange is that this particular woman went so far as to take on an acting name. Whether the acting name is her real name and the name that she says is her real name is just for show is unclear.

This particular form of confidence building may be going a little too far. In fact, it might even be a sign of a dissociative disorder. While it's hard to tell for certain, she has many of the typical symptoms of dissociative disorders. When people start believing that they are different people or that their original identities are insufficient, they create counter ones in response. Sometimes they create multiple personalities, forming the classic but rare multiple personality disorder. Most of the time though, they are unaware that they are doing it, and they just assume they black out for significant periods of time for no good reason. In the case of this young lady, she seems to remain fully aware of who she is, but she just chooses to pretend that she is an actor.

13) Pretend to Be Dead
Pretend to be dead to improve confidence Of course, if life feels like it's too hard for you, you could pretend that you're dead. After all, everyone knows that confidence shoots through the roof when you're dead. No more worrying about what people think of you. No more worrying about failing. The worst is over and done with. This is a condition that develops under severe bouts of low self esteem. It only becomes serious though when it turns into a dissociative self disorder. So someone who gets it would not be able to recognize his own face. When he looks in the mirror, all he sees is someone who he thinks does not belong.

The symptoms of this particular disorder are usually preceded by a severe blow to the back of the head and a concussion. Within 48 hours, swelling strikes. For individuals who have a healthy psyche, the healing response is not so difficult. People with low self esteem and low confidence levels can be drastically affected. The result is that they just wish themselves dead and suddenly relieve all of the psychological and emotional pressure. When you're dead, nothing else matters. Immediate psychiatric intervention is necessary when such cases develop as this is one of the least healthy ways to build up confidence levels. Patients who realize that they are not actually dead may sometimes become suicidal because they want to go back to those feelings of calm confidence.

12) Lie
Lie This one certainly isn't the best way to get your confidence up if you're planning on doing anything that requires honesty. Of course, this could potentially explain why politicians always seem so confident. Lying makes people more confident. It also makes them look more confidence if they can lie well. First of all, lying is something that they can become good at. Second, it gives them something to aspire to. In this rather unusual recommendation, Modern Man describes lying about working out regularly as being a great way to increase confidence and self esteem. The author does caution though that it's important you be ready to back up their claims. After all, nothing crushes your self esteem faster than being found out as a liar. So don't lie about knowing the Queen of England or being a secret agent. It just isn't easy to back up.

Ironically, this is another confidence boosting method that is based in a psychological disorder. Pathological liars lie because it makes them feel better and because they cannot help it. Pathological liars get a rush of endorphins and dopamine along with other mood enhancing hormones, according to Psychology Today. This makes them feel more confident and in control, and this is also what makes it so addictive. Thus they will lie about little things that don't matter as much as about the big things that do. It's like a drug that helps them to perform better.

Of course, Glamour has a different take on this issue. They claim that lying about something nice creates a boost of confidence because you know you've done something nice. And everyone knows when you do something nice, the karma fairy gives you confidence.

11) Perfume, Lotion, or Soap Up
Ah! I'm smelling GOOD! This one is slightly suspect, considering the source. Gilette claims that by making sure you smell nice, you'll feel much more confident. This would seem to make sense. After all, sweating and stinking is a great way to destroy your confidence unless it's as unassailable as a titanium wall. They ran a similar advertisement claiming the same thing about being hairless. Body hair is, of course, not really responsible for all of the low confidence levels out there, but removing it could help if you're feeling self conscious. Whether Gilette is the brand for you just depends on your preferences. Considering that these particular ad campaigns brought in millions according to their official marketing pack, it would seem that a lot of people agreed with them.

Alternatively though, "College Contradiction" recommends the exact opposite. If you're feeling like you need a confidence boost, you should try instead farting and blaming it on something else. Apparently there's nothing better to make yourself feel more confident than seeing someone else writhe in agony and embarrassment. It's much harder to blame facial hair on someone else though.

10) Read Something Completely Meaningless
The Gloss came up with a rather interesting idea. Instead of the usual recommendation that you read things that you might be able to use, it recommends that you read something that is completely meaningless to you. So that could mean that you read something about nuclear science or Brad Pitt's facial hair woes. It doesn't matter. The point is that you read something that you find absolutely meaningless. The idea behind this is that you will be reading it and suddenly feel so disgusted with yourself for reading something so worthless that your self esteem and confidence will have to go up. Readers who commented on the article listed some of their recommendations, but they did not state whether they found this more successful than bizarre.

However, it's not entirely off base. Random knowledge and trivia have been known to increase confidence levels as it can give you the opportunity to share some knowledge that most people don't know. Psychology Today discusses this, but they actually advocate reading up on subjects that interest you. If you're going to boost your confidence, you might as well do something that will benefit you at the same time.

9) Eat Chicken
Eating Chicken In one of McGill University's oddest studies, the analysts determined that people should eat chicken, nuts, and cheese to feel more confident. While they don't explain how it is that they came to this conclusion in their initial hypothesis, they state that these foods are filled with amino acids. Their research and conclusions supported their original hypothesis that these foods actually contained high levels of amino acid tryptophan, a hormonal chemical that boosts serotonin production and increases overall confidence.

Chik-fil-a will be happy to hear about this as will KFC. It seems that the results aren't dependent on what kind of chicken you eat or how you get it. It could be fried. It could be seared. It could be boiled. Just make sure it's cooked. Chicken has the highest levels of amino acids of all the foods they analyzed. They plan to conduct separate research to determine whether long term confidence boosting can result from eating enough chicken sandwiches. To get a real serotonin and confidence filling boost, go ahead and order that chicken with cheese and walnuts to get the full experience. In terms of health, remember that boiled, baked, and grilled chicken are better than fried and breaded. Staying slim is another way that people start to feel more confident, and it's hard to accomplish this when you're chowing down on piles of fried chicken.

- The Tao Of Badass -

8) Host an Indulgent Party for Yourself
One blogger has come up with a fascinating way to make sure that confidence levels shoot through the roof. The next time you're feeling glum throw a party for yourself. Here's the catch though. No one else is invited. The reason that you can't bring anyone else to the party is because you're going to be tempted to compare yourself to them. The other reason is because you never know when someone is going to say something negative. Apparently when you're trying to build confidence, the worst thing you can do is risk a negative comment. And the last reason is that if you invite other people, you're going to have to be worried about their needs.

No, this party is all about you. Get the food you want. Get the movie you want. Get the music you want. Get anything you want. Then spend a few hours just luxuriating and imagining what it's like. The author claims that this works beautiful for her. Her favorite movie to watch is "Mean Girls," and she recommends watching movies where people are nasty so you can feel better about yourself.

Alone Party

Alone time is actually a vital part of mental health, according to "World of Psychology." By being alone and allowing yourself to rest and recuperate, you can better handle situations. From there, you can then move on to being more confident in your actions. So while this does not necessarily make people more confident right away, it could ultimately develop confidence in its own way.

7) Take 1,000 Pictures of Yourself
Taking Pictures of yourself in the mirror In "Seven Absurd Confidence Boosters," the author recommends taking 1,000 pictures of yourself. She states that she did this and found ways to make herself even more beautiful. The journey into 1,000 pictures started out with just wanting 100. She decided that she needed to get over her fear of cameras and her own low self esteem. So she started snapping pictures. As she puts it, there was no way that she could be so hypercritical of herself when she had to look at so many different pictures. She states that she even learned to feel confident in spite of her flaws. Apparently after seeing them so many times, she said that they suddenly started to appear normal.

Now don't feel like you have to take all of these pictures in one sitting. She states quite clearly that she took them over a series of days, and she did not go through them everyday. Despite being a bit unusual, this one is also backed up by science. Repeated exposure can help to reduce chronic low self esteem and self loathing by helping people realize that their bodies are normal, according to "Body Image and Psychology." For some people, the fact that they do not see themselves regularly either because they avoid cameras or mirrors makes it all the more traumatizing when they do see themselves. By taking this many pictures, they can instead get a grip on their confidence levels and start to feel better about themselves.

You can even take this up a notch and take videos of yourself and watch them back.

6) Be Mean
Another surprising contribution from "Seven Absurd Confidence Boosters" is to be mean. Apparently cruelty and bullying make people feel stronger. Of course, that flies in the face of all the news and studies that report that bullies are actually just as insecure. However, the author has a solution to that. She says that guilt is the responsible party. Bullies actually do feel guilty for their actions, and so they are not able to maintain the boost of confidence that they get from picking out someone else's flaws or picking on them in general.

Being Mean to another person

While this would seem to rule out being mean, "Seven Absurd Confidence Boosters" doesn't give up. Instead, the author recommends that people make fun of pictures, movies, and strangers. Don't ever do it to them in person, of course. That could result in a number of different repercussions that could be devastating to your self esteem and confidence levels. Instead, go to places where there are a lot of people, and then mock them to your heart's content. Of course, she also warns that you should never put your comments in writing. That makes it possible for people to find you, and the guilt from that will ruin all of the self confidence gained as well.

Several studies have demonstrated the power of laughter to improve mood and self esteem. A study hasn't been done to determine whether laughter is more effective than being mean, but it certainly comes with a lot less guilt. So if you don't want to risk the negative consequences of being mean, you could always opt for the less risky laughter method.

5) Go Naked
Naked in mirror "Bizarre Confidence Boosters" claims that getting naked does a lot for making people feel more confident. No, it's not just standing in front of a mirror naked. It's walking around the house naked and doing your housework. This doesn't come with an advisory that you should make sure your windows and doors are securely locked and closed. Otherwise, you might find yourself lowering your reputation among the neighbors at the same time. To get the most out of this, you should try to spend at least 15 – 20 minutes every day naked.

Glamour recommends a similar strategy. It claims that people tend to feel insecure about their bodies. In many cases, this is because clothes make the body look lumpy or awkward. It can't always be blamed on clothing, but clothing can obscure the actual form. When you take your clothes off, you have to confront your actual appearance. It follows in a similar mindset of self exposure as the 1,000 pictures. Of course, in terms of common sense and avoiding embarrassing moments, don't combine the 1,000 pictures with going naked. That's just begging for a bad after event and lots of other reasons for lowered self esteem.

And by the way, the University of California in Berkeley just released a study that confirms these results. However, they have one caveat. When you're standing in front of a mirror analyzing your naked body, you need to make sure you step back. This will help you to see yourself in the big picture rather than the microcosm. Standing too close can actually make the experience a confidence detractor rather than granter. It's also important that you do not do this under a fluorescent light as this will make all of your flaws seem significantly larger and brighter.

4) Do 100 Things on Social Media
If it really only took doing 100 different things on social media, then confidence levels would be at record highs. That doesn't track with reality though, and that's why "Absurd Confidence Boosters" clarifies this particular exercise. Apparently the only way it works is if the 100 things on social media are self laudatory. They must also include appropriate pictures. This way you're getting yourself out there, and you're also leaving yourself open to all the praise that your friends are likely to heap on you. So, no, this doesn't mean that you should be putting out all 1,000 pictures you took.

3) Don't Apologize
The first thing that shy and amiable people need to do is stop apologizing. One apology is sufficient, and then it is only appropriate if you are wrong. Nothing detracts from confidence faster than taking the blame for something that isn't your fault. But it's not something that most people consciously practice.

2) Smell Something Crisp
Smell a lime The "Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation" discovered something unusual to boost confidence. Apparently smelling something crisp, particularly fresh produce boosts confidence levels. In their research, they found that green apples, limes, and cucumbers were the best choice when it came to confidence boosters. Not only that, but the scents also reduced stress responses. While it seems to work best if you smell the real thing rather than a manufactured scent, perfumes with green apple and cucumber bases are apparently good options as well. It's also easier to carry a small bottle of perfume or cologne in your bag than it is to carry a whole cucumber.

1) Get in an Argument with Yourself and Win
Some people strongly believe that the best way to increase overall confidence levels is to only argue with themselves. Not among themselves, but with themselves individually and out loud. In other words, if you decided that you wanted to argue about something, you would have both sides of the argument with yourself. That way, you're guaranteed to win. It seems an easy way to make yourself feel better, though it won't score you any points in your overall debating style.

Argument with Yourself to increase the power of confidence

While it's true that you should never be able to lose that argument, it isn't the most effective way to boost confidence levels. The University of Chicago performed a study and determined that actually losing fights or getting involved in something you hate can actually be a powerful confidence booster. The theory of this study revolves around the fact that most people are terrified of failure and certain things. Because of this, they exaggerate the potential side effects and end results, making them significantly worse than they actually are. When people are actually forced to confront those fears and failures, they often experience surges of confidence and endorphins as they realize that they are no longer being controlled by the fears. This does not work for everyone, but there is something to be said for conquering that fear you have. This is also why similar studies from University of Oxford and the McGill Institute have indicated powerful boosts in confidence when people stop procrastinating and just do what they have been avoiding.

Final Words
Some people seem to agree that traditional methods aren't working. So they've come up with their own unique ways to improve their confidence levels. Some of these are based on science while others are based on something else entirely. Regardless, if you're looking for an interesting way to increase your confidence, then you might want to consider some of these options.

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